anonymous

Great thread, brains! I heavily recommend this to anyone interested in the Apothicans. I find it interesting that the Mi Go originate from Fungus, as we see that growing in all dark, humid corners of Morg City.

Furthermore, I found this in Wikipedia: "The Mi-Go can transport humans from Earth to Pluto (and beyond) and back again by removing the subject's living brain and placing it into a "brain cylinder", which can be attached to external devices to allow it to see, hear, and speak."

2 hours ago, RadZakpak said:

Suspense is what I was going for by playing with expectations.

The difference about the original fate of Sophia and the fate in the Agonia fracture is interesting. You really play with the suspence for the readers, and it shows how close she was to death. Also quite ironic how she leaves Group 935, in oposition to how she stayed and kept loving Maxis when she was a robot, in an alternative reality

W00t w00t! Very plausible theory, Rad! I'll be coming back on this soon

EYE COLOURS

I am not sure and have absolutely no evidence for this, but could it all be related the the Aethereal being's proximity to the area? We always assume the occupant resides in the MPD, but that is actually merely it's cryogenically frozen body. It's soul has entered the Ethereal plane, which I believe is existing around everything. Quotes of Gersch, stating that "she is coming" and "she is close" make me think an Aethereal being is not always present at one and the same point, but rather, it is dynamic and able to move. In Classified's intro we see Samantha floating in the Pentagon, commanding the undead to attack the characters. In reality, of course, we aren't able to see her but she might very well be around. And this could be the reason of the eye colour. The moment Schuster saw the eyes being yellow again could be due to the different way the zombie was created....or due to Sam's proximity. "Richthofen's" zombies having blue eyes could be because he is watching nearby, following Victis' process. About the Avogadro, I am not entirely sure if the white is really his colour, or if this is the default zombie eye colour. I could see the APD being too weak to have the MPD's capabilities in controlling the zombies, and the undead seen in Camp Edward simply being regular, uncontrolled zombies. Thinking about Nuketown, I am not sure why the zombies in NKZ would have yellow eyes, as at the moment Sam would probably be busy in Griffin Station, attacking Ultimis. This theory is just a thought, and has alot of errors. It would not explain the eye colours in BO3 and Origins as well.

The fact the zombies in the Crazy Place wear the Schwarze Sonne, the Keeper symbol, and guard Agartha make me associate these beings with the Keepers more. The zomfibied knights in the tombs, guarding the element for knowledge-hungry scientists would perfectly fit with this. After all, they did succeed in keeping the element at the location. Purple is, however, associated with 'Hell', but Agartha is by some said to be Hell. What I also don't seem to understand is that the Apothicans in Shadows of Evil have yellow eyes, but after Shadowman's defeat I believe they are purple (is that right?), eventually still leading to the devouring of this universe. So who was in charge of the Apothicans now?

Red is...weird. In Blood, we know the Warden was in charge, possibly corrupted by the Apothicans. Mob was part of this trap, so I assume it is Warden/Apothican here as well. Note that in the Cycle, Blood, Mob, Gorod and Revelation happen after each other respectively. So something odd happened at the very moment the mobsters were trapped, and Primis arrived there.

I'm coming back on this when I have any new ideas.

COLOURS & ENERGY

Okay so, eye colour is also heavily correlated with a type of energy.

Richthofen, Buried: "All this talk about energy, it is so vague, ja? Just think of the big ones, positive and negative, north and south, light and dark, good and....HAHAHAHAHA...evil!"

This is said during the Lantern step, in which Richthofen needs the energy from the Witches (purple) and Maxis those of the undead. This step shows already the difference between two types of energy, one positive and one negative. 

Now in Revelations, we can see very distinct 'red' and 'blue' rays in the sky, possibly under influence of Shadowman and Monty battling for power and stability. We have seen so many applications of these two different colours that I am of the believe that this is the manifestation of what Richthofen called 'the big ones' in Buried. Two angels. Two energies. Who is red and who is blue, I don't know, but it is interesting that purple is the conjunctions of both.

However, @AetherialVoices found another way of looking into this:

"In Revelations we were given four "Runes of Creation" and their importance appears to be woefully overlooked. In many creation myths, the use of symbolic elements (typically water, fire, wind, and earth) in the shaping of creation are quite prevalent. Now we see these "elements", Shadow, Light, Fire, and Electricity being used in Zombies cannon. We can clearly see the two sides of the Aether in the skybox of Revelations, with the blue and red sides. However, these are not the Light and Dark Aethers. Both the Light and Dark Aethers share these red and blue elemental energies. However, they both have a unique energy of their own. The Dark Aether has the "Shadow Energy" (Purple), and the Light Aether has the "Light Energy" (Green). The direct influence of Light and Shadow energy is quite rare, however the use of the other two aetherial energies is quite common."

Too bad this story wont be realized anymore...it even somehow made the creation/dissolation of fractures seem epic, as Peter sorta fell right into it and then spitted out of it. But yeah, upon reading the radios about Peter and Pernell, one of my first thoughts went to the storybook. Peter saying all those 'yes sir's', like a real obeying soldier, and Pernell being power hungry instead of a clumsy helper of Peter and new member of the CIA... Thanks for sharing anyway, and the idea for a seperate 'side'-story of a person sometimes popping up in several books is good.

1 hour ago, RadZakpak said:

Glad you enjoyed! Yes, those 46 chapters + prologue and epilogue are my plans for Book 1 as a whole. But I do have another chapter planned that I want to put in somewhere, and when I get around to a planned chapter if I don’t feel like it will make a good chapter I may scrap some.

Ah, I see. You know, I only see 27 chapters on my mobile device, so I was wondering already how you could put so much intel in only 4 chapters more. But 46 must be enough haha

Epic one, this one's so much different than any chapter before. I guess Alone is a real fitting name, as we follow the little-speaking, suffering Nikolai here, without any real conversation. It sketches a realistic idea about the war: grey, cold, pain, loneliness. Oh and by the way, the part with those two boys, I just knew he would shoot them. It is awful, and I dont want him to but it fits well in the change Nikolai has made (also got that carpenter reference in the beginning :)). Its all bitterness now.

Another question: Are the seeable chapters on the teleportation menu the only Book1 chapters coming, or will there come more?

I like this chapter alot! I like the tons of references to other events (past and future). And that end of the test!  It is as horrific as unexpected, and I totally pictured it like a movie in my head. You really surprised me with this, and I'm curious how this thing will pack out. Well done!

I havent had such a severe hangover for a long time, so glad to have my ultimate medicine

Looks like the Fall of Richthofen has began. So cool to see you've used the MPD sacrificial event as his mental turning point. I also like the way how he lost the voices for a moment prior chapter, followed by the realization that he would never get rid of them, now causing him to slowly turning more insane. Like he gave up. Good building up towards this!

That moment the voices were gone....and later came back....

I can feel Richthofen's emotion on that moment. I felt it down my stomach: Its a real torture, rather than a gift

An enjoyable thing to do on a hangover day. I'm curious to Peter's story, as very little of it is known (which, I can imagine, makes it only more fun to write about). Chapter 18 has a great play on the characters! In the early chapters, Groph was always a bit the 'black sheep' member, underrespected by Richthofen and Schuster, but his character has made a major change. Schuster slowly starts to realize he is surrounded by insanity and I can actually relate a lot to him. Richthofen....his character is still your masterpiece. An interesting past: idealistic and good as well as insane and mercyless.

I remember some prior story-arc ideas (like the one about Mason in Vietnam) and felt they all had great potential. The best of those, however, I am of the opinion are Honor's Suffering and the one about the mysterious blacksmith in Nevada...

I once started writing a fan-made Storybook arc (of three chapters) about a CDC agent trapped in a neverending Grief loop, though I quickly stopped due to realizing I cannot write properly a book as well as my vocabulary is limited. But it might be an idea.

19 hours ago, RadZakpak said:

Also, what do you think of Peter? I know I haven't written much of him yet, and the next chapter is about him, but what more do you want to know about him? How do you relate/not relate to him? Is he boring or intriguing? What situations can you see him in as a spy in the OSS?

I was never really a fan of the over-the-top, brutal, simple-minded type of hero soldier Dempsey is, but McCain is kinda the opposite. He is softer, yet brave, funny (in a way better way than Dempsey) and has emphaty. I think it is a character alot of readers can relate to, as he seems one of the most 'normal' persons so far (not in a boring way, though). However, as with all characters, I like to see him having a soft spot/flaw or something. Perhaps one time he chooses for his own life above someone else, as it is the nature of human survival (however I absolutely dont see him as an egoist. Perhaps something else is better fitting). Eventually, Peter will die, as only a few main characters do. I hope that at that time, readers really live in him and are really saddened by the fact he dies. If you succeed in that, you are a pro-writer.

Another thing: A lot of the lore about Broken Arrow, CIA, Cold War, etc, happens on the background (not in a map). Perhaps some of them are fitting in parts of Book 2. Alot of it can be discovered in the early chapters of Book 3, at least.

To be fair, I think this is my favourite chapter thus far. It has kinda zero correlation with known events in the Story, while it is completely canon and explains quite some small things (Group 601, Monty's nudges, Schrieker zombies). But that is not the only reason I like it, it is the whole thing that hangs in the air.

- The father who sacrifices for his child, the villager who sacrifices for Richthofen, Richthofen's story about the Hitlerjugend kid and his mentality in general: Great. It pictures some bittersweet sphere.

- A reminder that zombies aren't fun, easy to kill enemies as they are in game. This attack in the mines was really gruesome and kinda well fitting in a sci-fi horror movie. I could really see the picture in front of me (and the sound of screaming undead and humans).

- The play of characterisms. I'm really fund on Richthofen's idealism, and even more fund on the slowly change the world around him makes his mind do. That story with the Hitlerjugend once again reminds us that Richthofen sometimes lacks empathy in a way, without him wanting it. I also like how you made the reader exactly understand what kind of person Schuster is.

3 hours ago, RadZakpak said:

On the other hand, zombies allow for more brutal and creative deaths without the question of morality

So I was recently thinking about this, concerning a real zombie apocalypse. Since I live in a village I would know alot of zombies, previously friends, family and other fellow-villagers. In a war you fight against your enemies (which are, of course, mostly just as normal people as I am, but the 'bad guys' in my eyes). In a war against the undead you would fight the victims, among who people you know. I might prefer to die than to kill them.

Abvipusly, I'm going too deep into this. A zombie apocalypse would be impossible, as a virus is impossible to be both extremely infectious, as well as being capable of occupy the mind, and the world of science not being able to predict these mutations etc

I want you to know that I, unconsioussly, always really look forward to new chapters. I admire your speed with writing the last ones. When I see a chapter is released, I struggle with being patient and wait till a good moment for reading it. Finally, I find a soft spot on the sofa, get a glass of water and enjoy the new stuff.

The titles are really well chosen, if you know the background. Of course, 'Hard Landing' is a WaW mission, but it is the mission that includes the NDU airfield, and funnily enough McCain and Hilario also get on an airport this chapter. And finally, it refers to the crash of the plane (spoilers alert). Love that last (repeating) sentence of Hilario and your humour.

As a side question: Was writing a chapter in which was fighted against living soldiers much different than writing about fighting against undead ones?

A very unexpected chapter, I like it! Also, I adore the fact that it is (as is your entire Storybook, of course) based on real events, and the occurance of Takeo's father. 

1 hour ago, RadZakpak said:

As another note, this chapter is a bit shorter than some previous chapters, and while writing it I was doing a lot of reformatting of my plans for each chapter in this book. I kept trying to cut out chapters to have an average page length more like that of a real novel, as if I keep the chapters as long as they have been the book would be much too big. But then I thought, I really shouldn't be doing a disservice to this story by omitting so much, especially since I am posting it here where there is no limit. From now on I am going to ignore any thoughts about a chapter being too short/too long or being unnecessary to the overall book because if I try to think too far ahead I will end up stifling what I can do with this story. Of course, if I ever did release a physical version of this book, I would change a ton, and write a whole second draft that is more concise, or I would split it up into two books. But for now, I'm going to remain somewhat unpredictable.

Not sure what you mean here. I mean, it is totally normal for a book to have not-equal chapters, right? If you would produce a physical version (which would be, for real, AWESOME and I would definately buy it), why couldn't it have non equal chapters?

One critique thing: In many chapters you are the devil in the details: describing how beautifull or gruesome the environment, a room, a person's expression, whatever is. This chapter does have that, but in a lesser degree than usual. I imagine the group walking through Filipinese jungle or whatever, with bodies on the edge of the muddy road or something, but thats up to the imagination of the reader (which has is charms as well). Perhaps lots of people like this 'faster' way of storytelling, but I'm more a guy for the details

Btw also love your great metaphores, memories, life lessons and other 'short stories' in your story. This intro reminds me of the intro of the 'Hemlock Philosophy' chapter

Lets fce the reality: This is so awesome. Despite me knowing the zombie story, every chapter you write makes me look forward to the next and makes me curious to it. You insert only very rarely some radio/audio reel quotes, and while your story follows all given information and is completely canon it is a true, complete story on its own, so I still dont know what will happen next. Love this so much. This is just exactly what happened, but then in more detail. Also love the way you give the characters their character: That is perhaps even more pretty.

The new mobile menu works perfectly, and I am way too much satisfied with that fact haha. Danke schön<3

Look forward to the testsubject chapters (at least, I assume they are about Nikolai, Takeo and Dempsey? Or perhaps Dempsey alone since it are all chapters of the American WaW Campaign). The first steps to the 'brotherhood' they'll get later.

20 hours ago, RadZakpak said:

Chapter 12 of Book 1, "Faithful Servant" is now on the site!

 

I have also gone back and made slight changes to previous chapters. I recently realized the Wunderwaffe DG-2 did not have its first prototype created until 1942, so previous references to the DG-2 are changed to be about the first version of the project.

A better birthday gift I couldn't wish from CoDZ! 

The horror of this chapter really got me. I dunno why, but I find wearing a blood-covered lab coat on a party and that monkey having a real skin rather than being a toy way more horrid than bloody organ-covered zombie slaughter. Gives me a real nasty feeling, next to the remaining ''brutal'' humour (similar to the Inglorious Basterds and Hatefull Eight Style). Good job

1 hour ago, RadZakpak said:

It’s my first week back from break and things look bleak in my math class but we will see.

Math is an absolute killer. Believe it or not, even in a biological study you cannot escape it. Recently had an exam in algebra (all in English), mostly about antidifferation and everything including that, but Im not good in it. Gave my neighbour a bottle of special beer and he explained everything to me better than any teacher (he's a physician), so lucky me I guess. 

If you got one specific part you dont understand, ask me, but in general I dont think I can help you. Best wishes man, I totally feel you

The way you've written this chapter makes the story and it's characters very alive! How's school doing btw? Something with IT, right?

Ahh, it would be a shame if those fine pieces of story telling would be disappeared in the deep dark abandoned corners of the Internet. Glad you brought them back!

I like it! Dont fully understand the ending, though. I assume he is Illuminati, but is he also known in the CoDZ story? Love the mentions of those Illuminati facilities.

Oh, and one time you say Sophia but you mean Samantha

Some brilliant shit you've got there Rad! Took some time to read it but I enjoyed every bit of it. Undone is so cleverly made: It even makes the "second outbreak of NDU radio signals" quote canon. While reading it, I forgot that Book 1 ends with Sam just in the MPD: This chapter is a brilliant intro the new powers of this entity.

Danke Schön is a masterpiece. I would personally more be in favour in two short chapters rather than one large, but that's just me. Richthofen is a funny man, but sometimesI forget how cruel he actually is. And why the heck do they let the only drunk person drive!

Some fan-creation:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZcezWbaNfl-Cz7XnZd273CXmRnwaJJNV3DSv52srx2s/edit#heading=h.bz7znaknjssv

Your story really must be printed out in real life...or downloadable on a Ereader.