perfectlemonade

It has been tough. It has been tough. It has been so tough the past month or so. I've watched friends leave, friends be humiliated, friends be betrayed. I've watched this site and, more specifically—the strategy section—lose its life, its lust, its beauty. Sure, we lost a lot. But we will not die. We will not go quietly into the night. No. Hell no. We will not. We will rise from our ashes, crushed under the weight of this void that has been left, and we will fight again. We will fight undead in Groom Lake, in a theater, a mental ward, a swamp. The undead breathe down our necks, scraping our cheeks, and we blow their brains out. We do. And we are not done. We are not done. No, we are far from done. There is still so much to do. Strategies are still being discovered each and every day. The pipe in No Man's Land; Insta-Trap; Insta-Trap (FIVE edition); Power Room on Ascension... and this is just recently. We are stumbling upon new strategies each and every day. 5and5 and I are collaborating to bring you a collection of the fastest strategies for every map, a guide that is shaping up to be revolutionary. So, come together, my brothers and sisters. Chopper, Eye, Jay, Vodstok, 5and5, Way, Pish, the newcomers. There are undead to slay. There are strategies to discover. There is greatness to be found and revealed. It is time. It is time. It is time.

You know what I'm feeling? I'm feeling another CODZL trailer. Maybe the image was in a previous CODZL trailer, but Jimmy's new background has me intrigued.

What are you talkin about? Me and Way are still here. Yeah dude, just take it nice and easy. The best 'early round' place to hang out is by the Thompson, but that involves kiting in a really tough area. I can rarely get through 20 without going down once in the Thommy room, even with the door to spawn closed. My suggestion is to use spawn control to your full advantage. Open up the doors slowly, meaning try to clear out every area before you're forced to move on. You can usually get to 12 or 13 using this. By that time, you will probably either have a Ray Gun or the Winter's Howl, and you can start running full map loops at that point. Just be sure to go very, very slow, especially up those stairs. Always run with your defensive gun out. Only shoot in the spawn or Thompson room. That's about all I've got for ya. Sounds like Way has you covered for the most part. Good luck! :D

Thanks so much Chopper! I've tried it out some more and I agree with you. The Sidedrop is, undoubtedly, the fastest in NML, but your shots are cleaner because the group is tighter by the Pipe. Definitely upload that game. I'd love to see it. ;)

Hey guys! I've got a very special thread for yall today! So I was thinking about NML the other day and my thoughts came to the pipe area. I had noticed that the challenge, created by iNightSparks, to successfully kite there wasn't really much of a challenge (no offense, Dan). I then thought to myself if 300 was possible here, if you could really complete not just a horde, but an entire game here. Well, I answered that question. It is not only possible to successfully get 300 kills here, but it is actually not that hard. What I call 'lopsided spawns'—when every zombie spawns on either side of the map—are a nonfactor here. Lopsided spawns can really mess you up at the Back Pool or Sidedrop, but they can be handled extremely easily at the pipe. The kiting itself, if you are dragging out and making clean cutbacks, is no harder than the Back Pool. The actual speed of this strategy isn't too bad. I would say it's about the same speed as Sidedrop. Just depends on the spawns, to be honest. This strategy is really a legitimate one, I think. I certainly know I already like it better than the damned Back Pool. This is a really good place, and I'd highly recommend it for anyone looking to spice up No Man's Land and to also maybe find an alternative to the Sidedrop, if that's just not working out for you. Just mimic my movements in the video. The more space you have by the walls, the better! Dogs can teleport and trap you very quickly, so it's best to make as much room as possible through dragouts. Last little tip I have for you guys: Don't be afraid to back off and 'go for a walk' around the swamp or the telepad. If you feel there's nowhere to go, back off. Okay, I think that's about all I have for now. I'd love to see some of the true NML Gods try this out. They could wreak some havoc with this!

Nicely done! :D

Submitted my nominations. Come on guys! Keep this thread at the top! This is big stuff here!

Is stamin up really neccesary for this strategy? Can you not run up the stairs quick enough without it? If not I would get Mule over stamin up. Also depending on fact when George exists and where zombies run back when you go down, I would either run up the light house and take zipline to jugg or run straight to jugg if its clear. It is also not a bad idea to horde them up before leaving to jugg and shoot them a little bit so they don't respawn when they enter a new zone. Well done on your 60, Keep it up. Yeah I really have feel that you need Stamin Up to get up those stairs in time. Especially when they start spawning in faster... it's just for the best. The zipline is pretty inconsistent. I've seen a couple people jump and either miss it or just flatout get Treyarched and fall to their deaths (HoardKillRepeat comes to mind). I'm pretty sure I added a bit on damaging them to prevent respawns though... Oops, guess not. Good catch!

Storyteller medal? Strategist medal? I THINK YES. Glad you guys are taking our suggestions to heart! Another idea for Codz Premium: Allow for a higher amount of medals to be active. Like, instead of 6, you get 9. You get my point. :)

Call of the Dead Round 60 Achieved! Hey everyone! Hope you're having an excellent Labor Day weekend; I sure am. So, as you can see, I have recently completed a Call of the Dead run to round 60! My only down was on 54, and the following recovery was some of the most intense moments I've ever had in Zombies. Past rounds 50, things get odd. Entire hordes start taking 7, 8, 9, even 10 shots with the Scavenger to kill. It's really odd to have a map in which killing is so incredibly difficult. The lack of a power weapon forces you to put ammo over just about everything else. Every round past 50, you are forced to make a decision regarding your Scavenger: spin the box midround, and some of the box spots on this map are so bad that I don't see that working out well, or buy a 74u and finishing out the round with that. On 49 (I think), when I had to trade out my Scavenger for the first time, I hit the box midround. I got lucky with it and got my Scavenger back within 20k. However, I realized that I couldn't survive like this, so whenever I needed a new Scavenger—which was just about every round past 54 or so—I would just buy a 74u to finish off the last of them. This would only take about 20 or so minutes, so it really wasn't too bad. But, alas, I'm already getting into the high rounds. Here's my 1-60 guide and breakdown! Rounds 1-4 Try to knife exclusively for the first two rounds, saving your pistol ammo for round 3. Four headshots then a knife on round 3 should kill the zombie. Induce drops by planning points wisely. By this I mean you will always get a drop at 2500 points. If you're already at 2500 at the end of round 2, kill the last zombie with a grenade so you can choose when to pick it up. Better yet, if you hit 2500 at the start of round 3, you can truly make the most out of the drop. Once you finish round 3, chill out by the boat leading to the lighthouse. There is a spawn point right in front of you and you can normally get one or two knife kills before opening up the boat. Using spawn control to your advantage, pick off stragglers, slowing make your way down the stairs and opening up the door to the 2nd floor of the lighthouse. You should have enough for the last door to the ice slide, then buy the sickle. Rounds 4-10 Use the sickle, emptying out your pistol into zombies before knifing for maximum points. I like hanging out under the MP40 boat, but anywhere works, really. Just be sure that you're safe. On this map, safety is your top priority. You should have enough for Juggernog at the end of round 6 or 7. Open up Jug and continue knifing until the end of round 9. Save a crawler and PaP your M1911. You will probably not have enough for Flopper at this point, but do not fret. Shooting two hordes at the start with one shot each and knifing any crawlers should give you more than enough for Flopper. Rounds 11-25 Your main objective for these 'transition' rounds is to set yourself up for the rest of the game. You will need to, in no particular order: -Buy Stamin Up and Quick Revive -Get a Scavenger, Ray Gun, and Dolls -Kill George 4 times (to get all 8 perks) -Open up the entire lighthouse Most people complete these rounds on the beach in front of the lighthouse, but I much prefer the spawn. Running the beach is inconsistent, especially in the early rounds. There's a lot of corners and too many spawn points. Zombies can come at you from too many directions and there are a lot of grounders to get stuck on. However, in the spawn, there are fewer places for the zombies sneak up on you, and if you're running it the right way (see my down recovery video), there will be no grounders to mess you up. Not only this, but you can take full advantage of the water's effect on zombies (some say it increases splash damage, others say it lowers the health) by killing with fewer shots used. Once you get Mule Kick from George, you'll want to save a crawler and hit the box at the end of the round for a Ray Gun. For now, though, you won't need it. You will only start using the Ray Gun at round 34, when the Hyena Infra Dead starts being a one shot kill. Rounds 26-50 Now you're set for the rest of the game. This is when you start the strategy. This strategy is NOT mine. The first person I saw do it was MrDaveTheRave way back in September of last year. However, Superhands was the first to put it on Codz. So here it is: Fim7DUk75QQ The basic gist of this is to start at the top of the lighthouse, sitting at the ledge. Once zombies start to spawn from the window, drop down (you will survive the fall due to PHD Flopper). Even at round 26, zombies are spawning in so quickly that you will have a maximum of 3 zombies coming at you from the actual beach. The rest will funnel through the doorway from the lighthouse, and all you have to do is a simple U-train. Once they're all grouped up, shoot them on the beach. This is where my strategy differs from Super's. Leading them all the way back up to the 3rd floor of the lighthouse takes way too long and is unnecessary. As long as you're quick when going about your killing, you will always have time to sprint back up to the top of the lighthouse. From there, it's just rinse and repeat. At round 34, when the Hyena Infra Dead starts take two shots to kill, you'll want to bust out your Ray Gun. This bad boy, coupled with Double Tap, just tears through crawlers made weak by the Hyena. I cannot think off the top of my head how fast/how many shots it takes to kill a horde on this round, and I'm sorry for that, but I do know that on 40 one Hyena bolt and a clip of Ray Gun ammo will down a horde. Normally it's a judgement thing. What my strategy for killing with the Ray/Hyena combo was killing the first horde with just the Hyena. Then I'd subtract two bolts (or one, if you find that two just ain't cutting it) and kill the weakened group with the Ray Gun. During this time, you'll be wanting to kill George for his Wunderwaffe. This is the saving grace of Call of the Dead. One entire Hyena Infra Dead will kill George, if I'm not mistaken. This makes getting the Wunderwaffe a piece of cake. Once you get it, you'll notice that rounds go by so, so much faster. It's not uncommon for round 50 to take about the same time as round 45 because you have the Wunderwaffe, a vastly superior weapon to the Hyena Infra Dead. Make sure to kill them as shown in my round 50 video and to never reload while sprinting back up the spiral staircase. The only time I've ever met zombies at the very top of the lighthouse was when I reloaded while sprinting up to the top. Rounds 51-60 This is when it gets ridiculous. These last 9 rounds are going to take a very, very long time, as the Scavenger/Hyena becomes positively worthless. You will still be able to kill hordes, but at a very high price of ammo. Killing an entire horde on round 59 with the Scavenger took ten. TEN!!!!! Just an idea of how incredibly difficult it is to kill this high without true power weapons. At the end of round 50, it's time to part ways with Mustang and Sally. They've served you well, I know, but they won't save you at this round (trust me). So you need to hit the box for a crossbow. Once you get it, PaP that bad boy and you have a somewhat reliable 'oh shit!' weapon to save your ass. Just remember though, the Awful Lawton is notoriously inconsistent, so don't ever feel too comfortable with it. I don't necessarily think this is a bad thing though—always having to be alert can really help you keep alive (duh). So at the end of just about every round past 50, unless you are very fortunate with drops (Nukes, Insta Kills, Max Ammos), you'll need to spin the box. DO NOT HIT THE BOX MIDROUND. You can get away with it 2 or 3 times, but the chances are extremely high—especially with the horrible box locations Call of the Dead—that you will go down eventually. It's just better to finish the round the a 74fu2. Taking an extra half hour, or even longer, is better than losing a Revive and going down in a bad spot. Just don't do it. Now, onto the other stuff... George: Your Best Friend (Then You Kill Him) George has always been hated, and for good reason. He, to put it bluntly, fucks you over with his rage and his lightning hammer and all that other stuff. He just sucks. Or does he? Eliminating Getting Shocked You know the crazy lightning that stuns you when George does the hammer ground pound? Yeah, it's a real pain in the ass. But there's a way to prevent that! I'm not entirely sure if this is a glitch, but I'm pretty sure it's not, because just about everyone does it. Anyways, all you need to do is knife either George or an electrified zombie on Insta Kill. That's it. Your character will become shocked and George's ground pound will no longer affect you, making it possible for you to kite while he's pissed. The Wunderwaffe George offers a ton of help on Call of the Dead solo runs. Like I've already said, George drops a Wunderwaffe, packed with the potential to kill 180 zombies, when you kill him. A full Wunderwaffe, a full Scavenger/Hyena Infra Dead, a full Porters X2 Ray Gun, and 3 dolls will get you through round 59 with ammo to spare. The Wunderwaffe probably accounts for 2/3 of these kills. That's how incredibly awesome George is. Without the Wunderwaffe, round 60 on Call of the Dead solo would be just about impossible. Perks George also drops a random perk bottle when you kill him. It will take you about 8 rounds to get all of the perks, but when you do, it's so worth it. Double Tap, Mule Kick, and Speed Cola are all pretty vital to killing power. Even Deadshot can make killing with the 74fu2 a lot faster. Without George, you'd just be stuck with your 4 perks, so it's a welcome relief when he shows up! Getting Max Ammos This is pretty much common knowledge, but no guide to Call of the Dead is complete without mentioning the Max Ammo trick. So, basically, what you do piss off George so that he ground pounds all the zombies around him. Once the horde is electrified, kill them with your Hyena Infra Dead. A Max Ammo will drop 100% of the time, as long as it has been 4 rounds since the last time you've done it. This is, essentially, a replacement for dogs. Just a tip that should go as common sense: make sure to use all of your Hyena ammo to get maximum efficiency from your weapon. While it may not seem like it, past 50, every horde and every shot counts to the ultimate goal. The Easter Egg: Your Second Best Friend I was at the end of round 57 and I was dreading the next round. George was gone and I knew that I'd have at least 30 minutes of spraying with the 74fu2 ahead of me before having to spin the box yet again for another Scavenger. But then, BRAINBLAST. It was like a lightbulb that went off above my head. I could do the Easter Egg! So I got my VR11 and completed that bitch. 58 began and I had a full Wunderwaffe to help me through it. So this is why I'm giving this tip: On either round 58 or 59, depending on when you killed George, save a crawler and complete the Easter Egg. I finished that bitch in just about 15 minutes flew through 58 as well as 59. By that time, you're tired. You want it to be over. This is the biggest tip I can give you for handling this. The Easter Egg was probably the highlight of those last 5 rounds. Safety Over Speed! This goes without saying, but Call of the Dead is special in the fact that there is nothing to completely save you. That's why I ran this strategy. Granted, it was painfully slow, as my pal way2goo told me on Youtube, but it was safe, and that has to be your number one concern on Call of the Dead, in my opinion. Not hitting the box midround also applies here. A Scavenger is not worth a Revive, no matter the round. Pack a Punching Midround It is unavoidable that you'll need to Pack a Punch midround, be it the Scavenger or the Ray Gun. You really need to be careful here. This is one of the few parts about this map that is just straight up dangerous. However, if you're smart about it and you throw a couple Semtexes at the horde to eliminate their respawn when you get too many zones in front of them, it isn't too bad. For PaP'ing midround, I always wait until the Pack a Punch Machine heads to the Stamin Up pool. The spawn by the ship is a death trap and the spawn in the spawn (haha) a) takes too long and can get pretty clustered with the zombies hopping the fence and meeting you two ways. For the Stamin Up pool, all you need to do is put your gun in the machine, drag out the zombies by the Stakeout, then hop through the water. Easy stuff. Recovering From a Down I had my first, and only, down on 54 and, I'll admit, it was crazy. The down was completely my fault—I got trapped on the second floor of the lighthouse because I took too long to kill my horde—but the moments following were... intense. I counted 3 times where I could've died and, let's be honest, I just got lucky for most of the time. However, if you do go down, this is the order in which you should rebuy your perks: 1) Juggernog 2) PHD Flopper 3) Stamin Up 4) Quick Revive Now, if you go down next to one of these perks, then by all means rebuy that one instead. But if you go down near the beach, this is just what I'd do. Be sure to kite them up and throw a couple nades or Claymores at them to prevent them from respawning ahead of you. I know I didn't do this, but it really does make it easier. Once you have all four perks, you will still feel naked and exposed. You will have no 'gun perks' (Mule Kick, Double Tap, Speed Cola, Deadshot) and thus, it will be harder to kill. You will have lost your Ray Gun and, if you get Mule Kick before Double Tap and Speed Cola through George, your killing speed will be greatly reduced. However, it's manageable. You will just need to rely more on your Hyena/Dolls and less on your Ray Gun (meaning, only subtract one shot from the lethal shot total, instead of two). It'll take at least 7-8 rounds for you to completely recover, and those 7 rounds may take a long ass time because you'll be going through Hyena ammo waaaaaaaaaay faster than normal. Prepare to spend a plethora of points at the box—and also spamming the 74fu2—before you get all 8 perks back. And, after that, well, you're home free. Closing Remarks After completing my run, I'd say this game was indeed an ordeal. It was awesome for the first 55 or so rounds. A ton of fun. I loved having to get creative with my killing methods and I love how complicated this map is. There's a certain intensity and atmosphere—maybe it's the darkness, maybe it's the snow, I really don't know—that forces you to stay 115% focused for the entire game. And I really like that. I like how ammo is always a problem. You have to be both skilled and savvy to be successful at this map. But then, there's the last 4 rounds. They take so, so long. I hate to 'toot my own horn' here but getting to 60 on this map is a testament to not only your ability, but also your patience and your knowledge about how the zombies behave and exist. And if you can do what I've shown here, I assure you that you can get to 60, which would leave you at fifth in the whole world! Big thanks to Downrun and Vodstok for cheering me on. Also thanks to Superhands for the Max Ammo trick and MrDaveTheRave for the awesome strategy. Okay, I'm out! Thank you so much for reading and I hope I helped out! -perfect

I will bet you brains (when they come back) that the diner map is, in fact, a Zombies map.

YES. YES. prfh23pirbjvweoihjbvpirhegivqhcviorhrveoiwyvbg YESSSSS

I really like where you're going with this. Some good characterization here. :D

More like 1 month and some change, but all right.

Here's something to think about: Scenario 1) The astronaut glitches out and hugs you. Okay, so it wouldn't be fun, but if you have permaperks, it's not really that big of a deal. Just have your partner cover for you while you make your way back. But this shouldn't even be that big of a deal in the first place. In co op, I feel it's pretty much a given for one of the players to always have QED's for the exact purpose of the glitching astronaut. Because, and I'm sure you know this, but at 50, killing the astronaut with ray guns just won't cut it. But if you have 3 QED's? The chances are pretty damn high for that blast thing that kills it instantly. OR Scenario 2) Round 65. Astronaut is locked and you've got a good setup, but then, you get trapped. Think of how hard it would be to coordinate the both of you going to Area 51 to get Jug. And if it's not Jug? Then you have to spend the entire round and then some without Jug which, let's be honest, just flat out sucks. I would go with the Easter Egg. A glitched astronaut is manageable. A 30+ minute round without Jug? Not so much. Just my thoughts XD

Author's Note: Well people, a lot sure has changed since that day almost a year ago now when I was reading through some of the stories in this forum and decided to see if I could use my love of creative writing on the forum. I toiled with the idea for weeks, but finally came back to a short story I wrote for English a while back. The assignment? To write a fictionalization of something that you did over summer break. Naturally, I chose the last thing to happen to me that summer: a cruise to Bermuda in mid-August. The story featured a zombie outbreak on the ship and the entirety of the story was just that prologue. Well, I came back to it and added a first chapter. Then a second. And then it was 10 chapters long. Just like that. And it was, in my opinion, one of the best things I've ever written, even though it was too long to be considered a short story and too short to be a novel (not a good thing in book terms). I knew there would be a sequel about halfway through writing it. I knew I couldn't leave Daniel and Emily at just 81 pages. I knew I had to make them endure even more zombie hell on land. And that is where this story comes in. So without further ado, I present... Fire on the Mountain One 112 Days After First Infection It’s the same thing every time. We stare at each other, and I am overtaken by this paralyzing despair. But she doesn’t feel it. She wants me to die. I think she does, at least. The virus does. I am pretty sure of that. In this dream, my mother pounces and we collide and she claws at my skin; I feel the infection seep into me. And then her teeth are in my neck and like some animal she moans because my flesh is the greatest thing that she’s ever tasted. Her friends come to join her and I feel teeth and fingers all over me. Then there is nothing. There is no Emily. Davidson is still screaming but I’m not. I’m dead. That’s weird. Then why do I die every single night? After that, I slowly realize where I am. That one horror has been swapped for another. That my mother does not exist anymore. And I’m stuck on this base with my father while he goes around prepping for nuclear holocaust or whatever the hell he does. I have no friends here, and Emily is even worse off than me but at least we have each other. And Colin. That kid. He’s quieter now. He doesn’t have a PSP. Every night, I turn on the lamp and slowly get out of bed. It’s only 3:22. I don’t go back to sleep after I wake up from the dream. I would rather walk around in a haze for my entire life and have a heart attack at age 35 than endure that same dream twice in one night. And every night, I wonder if maybe being infected isn’t so bad after all. And usually that’s the end of it. A new day begins with my mind locked up by the Xanax, some kind of chemical shield protecting it from the memories of the cruise ship. I sit in bed, humming to myself. Or I watch TV. Or I take a shower so long the water becomes icy cold and goosebumps explode across my legs and arms. Instead, there’s a knock at the door. I stare at the slate of wood and I am pretty sure I wonder about the human need for privacy, and we would go so far as to cut down trees just so we could do embarrassing stuff in peace, but the Xanax blocks out the thought. Or the memory of the thought. I don’t know. It’s not a selective shield. It doesn’t just block out the terrible memories, but everything. We should start calling it that and then the door opens and it’s Emily. I remember the look of pure, sweet relief on her face when I told her she could stay with us and when I kissed her on the ship and every kiss we’ve shared since and our promises and the fear of having to start school once the new semester starts but at least knowing that I’ll have her with me and although we’ll both be basket cases, at least we can be basket cases together. As a couple. “Hey Daniel.” She laughs and gives me a little smile, but as she steps into the lamplight and takes a seat on the foot of my bed, I can see that her eyes are puffy and red and her face is scarred by tears. It’s one of those nights. Where she’s just so horrified and so broken about what happened with her family and with everything that she can’t sleep. And she just cries. But I can’t imagine anything right now. The Xanax gets in the way of that. “Yeah,” she answers, crawling under the covers with me. I smell her. The smell breaks the shield some and I think just how incredible it is and how incredible she is, but the shield quickly recovers and I’m a zombie again. She sniffles. “Bad dream?” “Sorry,” she says. Emily touches my face. “I do, Daniel. I always feel horrible—always—but you make me feel less horrible.” That’s our relationship. Making us feel less horrible about our lives. She kisses me and we get into it and then she tugs away. “No, I get it,” I reply, trying to sound confident and not hurt by it or anything. “You have a lot on your mind.” “It’s really no big deal, Emily.” I take hold of her hand and with the other, turn on the TV with the remote. It’s late night CNN. Or early morning. The anger. The shield shatters into a million pieces. But it got out. Something survived. I check the clock. Chill, Daniel. Chill. 5:31. In twenty-nine minutes, my father will wake. He will know. He will know what’s going on, and he can give me the straight up truth. And I can know what’s to come. What I will see, what I will have to do, again. She doesn’t squeeze back. “What the fuck is this?” “What did you just say, Daniel?” Dad sets his coffee down on the **** please report this topic, post **** counter. This entire house is horrible. The same piss-yellow walls. The smell: cheap disinfectant. There’s only health food in the fridge and just three bedrooms. Emily has to sleep on the couch because Dad wouldn’t let me give her my bed. There is no home for me now. So this is not home. My mind is still picking up the pieces of the chemical shield in the car ride over to the Fort Bragg Command Center, his ‘workplace’. Dad’s car, a ten-year-old Mercedes, smells like sweat and cigarette smoke. It makes me dizzy to be in it for too long. The bullethole in her forehead. “Correct. But the CDC lacks the manpower to properly control this disease. That’s where we come in. We’re the ones that actually combat the infected, these so-called ‘zombies’. We’re the ones that protect the country. Our people. The CDC just looks for a cure or vaccine and sets the protocols on how to handle the infected.” My father turns onto a secluded drive, leafless Japanese cherry trees lining the median. At the end of the road, a large office-like building reaches ten stories into the sky. I can make out the letters on the face of the building against the dull overcast: Fort Bragg Command Center. “Because Daniel,” he says. “You’re going to help make the protocol.” Sometimes I am jealous of Emily. But then I think of the bad nights, like the one she had last night. And then I feel like crap because I’m a selfish person for thinking that, but I can’t help it. That’s my first thought as I take a seat before the long conference table, right next to my dad. I’m surrounded by men dressed in top of the line suits and officer uniforms, all staring at me like I’m a lunatic or wedding crasher or something. “Gentlemen,” Dad greets as soon as everyone is settled in. Mumbles in reply. The conference room is horribly stereotypical. Boring, beige walls. The table stacked with papers and laptops and iPads. A screen on the far wall for conference calls and Powerpoints. And the smell—coffee. Old coffee. Take me home now. “Well, Mr. Secretary, this is my son. He was one of only thirty-three survivors of the Magnificence of the Seas incident. And since we have been called here together today to discuss the possible containment of this new virus, I thought Daniel should be here. He knows better than anyone what these things are capable of, and how to stop them.” He pats me on the shoulder. Like he’s proud that I survived a zombie outbreak or something. “Am I right?” Everyone looks at me like I’m crazy. “But, General, don’t you think it’s a little drastic to drag a… kid here? To this meeting?” I try to identify the speaker, but everyone here is mono-ethnic. “But he’s already told us everything—” No one says anything after that. My father smiles, proud of himself. “Okay, good,” he continues. “The folks from the CDC, what do you have for us?” The next slide shows a grotesque picture of a mutilated, deformed zombie being dissected by men in orange biohazard suits. I can make out ‘CDC’ on one of the helmets. “Infected seem to be incredibly resilient creatures. We discovered this one, Subject 1Z, alive and well, 14,000 feet down at the wreck of the Magnificence of the Seas. The fact that one of these things survived at phenomenal pressures is a testimony to the sheer resilience of the virus. The only way to dispatch of an infected, in our experience, is to inflict critical trauma upon the brain. All toxins—excluding extremely corrosive acids and very powerful neurotoxins—seem to be useless against the undead. Fire does little to its wet skin. Electricity, however, has been deduced to be extremely efficient against the infected, as their weakened nervous systems are particularly susceptible to even very low voltages. Trauma to the heart, lungs, liver, and stomach, on the other hand, seems to not affect the undead. However, since infected still require fuel—specifically human flesh—one could argue a devastating blow to the stomach could, over time, kill one of them, essentially ensuring that they would starve to death. We are assuming Subject 1Z only survived as long as it did due to the fact it had a full stomach when the ship was scuttled. Next slide.” “Mr. Carper, what do you have to say about this?” “I said,” the CDC guy says. “What do you think of all this?” No. That would be wrong. I’m going to be a part of something that could save this country, that could save humanity, even if for just a little while. I have to give it my all. I can’t be the apathetic shell of my former self that relies on Xanax to just get out of bed in the morning. Not anymore. “Some of us will survive. And we need to know how to live after that. For one, every killed zombie—zulu, infected, whatever you want to call it—must be destroyed. Burn it, blow it up, melt it… whatever. But anything that comes in contact with an infected individual, dead or alive, sentient or not, must cease to exist. No exceptions. “Then there’s the common sense stuff.” “Daniel,” Dad says. “Explain to us what the ‘common sense stuff’ is. We want to write the protocol on handling a full-blown pandemic. We have to cover everything. Can you help us with that?” I’m on the title page. My name. Forever imprinted into humanity. When this shit hits home—and it will—I will, hopefully, have made a difference. Hopefully, I will save at least one life. That would make this entire thing, going back to the ship, worthwhile. But the Carper Protocol will help. Every city with a population of over 50,000 will now have a relief center stacked with food and water that can last them two months. A presidential speech will be given to explain the public of the situation. Flyers will be posted on every street corner. I can kill them. My mother. So, so sick. The door opens behind us. Dad strolls through, closing his umbrella. Microscopic droplets of frozen water slide off the slick surface of the umbrella. I look at him. He understands what I’m asking. Can I tell her? He shrugs and sulks off to bed. Deep breath. The Xanax beckons. “What happened?” she repeats. Her eyes widen. “Public? But don’t you think that’s… not good? Everyone is going to flip.” She doesn’t say anything after that. And I can’t really blame her. It’s traumatic and it sucks and it’s unfair and we’re probably going to die, but we have to at least give ourselves a chance. Tomorrow, before Dad goes to ‘work’, he’s sitting us all down and telling us the plan. Where to go in case of an outbreak. Where the guns are kept. How to defend ourselves, though I don’t think we particularly need that.” The breathing. Panic attack. Emptiness. 113 Days After First Infection I’m on my last pill by the end of the night. I’ve taken so much some would call it ‘abuse’ or a ‘suicide attempt’, but it’s not that. I have to have it. To function. Taking 8 pills in one night isn’t a suicide attempt—it’s the only thing keeping me alive. Because I’m sure if I didn’t have it to guard me from the echoing moans of undead bouncing around inside my mind, I’d certainly abuse them and I’d certainly want to end my life. “Hey bud.” He says, “What do you need? I’m in a meeting.” “Her name is Dr. Rumline.” He’s quiet for a while. “Daniel, you just got it refilled two weeks ago. I don’t think they’ll let you get some more this soon.” He says, “I don’t know if I can allow that, Daniel. How do I know that you’re not… abusing it? That you’re not giving it to Emily?” “Then what, Daniel?” His breathing is heavy on the other end of the line. I can tell that I hurt him. But he’s hurt me. We have no one and he doesn’t care. How can I be expected to respect him when he’s all but abandoned us? My hand twitches and I throw the receiver across the **** please report this topic, post ****. It shatters a glass cabinet and Emily yelps from the couch and I am having trouble even forming thoughts. But it’s not from the crumbling chemical shield encompassing my mind. It’s the rage, the blinding anger at everything. It’s the hopelessness. I just want to kill something. I want to kill something innocent. 8:52. Emily’s hand is in mine and Colin is kicking a rock in front of us. He’s got this smile on his face that tells me this is one of the few moments where he can escape this whole mess. Where he can be a kid, free of the chains he was bound to at the ship. I haven’t seen my friends in months. After… I knew I could never befriend those people I knew at school again. They sent me ‘get well soon’ cards and such. They left me encouraging posts on my Facebook wall. They tweeted me. They texted me. From what I could hear, I was a certified badass at school. I guess I still am. There were rumors that it wasn’t pirates that took down the ship, but actually zombies, and I’m some zombie hunter. They thought that was cool. Emily and I haven’t been back to the movies since then. “What do you mean?” There’s a voice in my gut that’s telling me something else, though. I can take it. I know I can. I’m Daniel Carper, Sr. “It’s okay, Dan Dan.” That’s what she calls me sometimes. Dan Dan. It makes me feel like a moonshiner or something, but I can’t to help some when she says it. “I know there’s a storm coming,” she says. “But we survived once, and we’ll do it again.” I turn around to face my father. His cold eyes are tinged with red. I’m not sure if it’s from the cold or crying. “I think we need to talk, Dad.” My father takes a seat in his chair. The Dad Chair. Every family has one. The chair—usually a Lay-Z-Boy—that the father of the family has reclined in so much that his scent is interwoven with the fabric on a molecular level. I shut off the TV. We both start talking at the same time, and then stop five words in. I take a deep breath and nod. Emily squeezes my hand. That gives me a little jolt of confidence. “Dad, we need you. These things… they change you. They make you into something you’re not. And that person terrifies me. Mom isn’t here to help me through it anymore. But you are. I need you. Colin needs you. All of my life, you’ve put us second. And now more than ever, we need you to lose that. We need you to put us first. So when everything changes, and trust me, it will, we’ll be together and maybe, just maybe, we can all get out of this alive.” “I think that transitions nicely into what I was going to say, Daniel.” He laughs, and we all feel obligated to laugh as well. “Because, well, our conversation on the phone today made me think. And I think that I have been a pretty crummy dad to you and Colin and a bad host to our guest, Emily. But the thing is, and I hate excuses, but the thing is I never had a dad growing up. He died when I was just five-years-old. I don’t remember much about him. So I don’t have much to go by. And I always tried to do things with you and Colin, but at the same time, I had to take care of myself. Your mother and I’s marriage was always kind of rocky and it caused me a lot of stress. And I coped with that by drowning myself in my work. But that came with a cost: missing out on almost all of my sons’ lives. And for that, Daniel and Colin, I am so, so sorry. Colin rushes him and they share a beautiful hug and then I’m hugging him too and Emily escapes upstairs. There are a lot of ‘I love you’s’ and whatnot and eventually Dad ushers Colin to his bedroom and tucks him in for the night and it’s just incredible. Dad strolls back down the stairs. We hug again and sit back down. “It’s okay, Dad. I forgive you.” My father stands up, wipes of his uniform. Goes to his bedroom. It’s so quiet I hear him shut off the light. I make coffee. Emily is watching a Christmas show on TV, even though Christmas is still over two weeks away. I never understood the logic behind these programs. There is no variety. Just the same thing every single year. “When what’s going to happen?” I gulp. “What?” “Shit.” It hurts, to know that something like this is coming, that it’s unavoidable, and you can’t do a thing about it. The best thing we can do is prepare ourselves for the worst. I feel faint and take a seat, sipping on coffee. Whatever these people think this will become, just another flu or Chicken Pox, they are so, so wrong. It will be the worst thing this world has ever seen. She doesn’t answer. It’s not like I expected her to. I squeeze Emily’s hand as the president clears his throat and begins his speech. The low murmur of reporters instantaneously ceases when Obama begins, creating this eerie silence in the room. The CNN logo spins around in circles at the lower right hand corner of the screen. Gasps, followed by ‘shushes’ from officials. Obama remains quiet as the noise dies down. “Now,” he begins. “We have kept you in the dark for a lot of this. But I believe—and none of this is on the script—that it’s time everyone knew just what’s going on here. “That’s why I’m telling you this, my fellow Americans. We cannot take this lightly, as some fantastical thing that will never affect you, because it will. It will, and we will not be prepared. This cannot happen. So I am issuing the Carper Protocol, named after one of only thirty-three survivors of the Magnificence of the Seas. In accordance with the Carper Protocol, martial law will be declared. Food and gasoline will be rationed. You will only have a certain amount of water per day. Community relief centers will be set up. You can get your own copy of the Carper Protocol at your community center, which will be named following this broadcast. Thank you, and have a safe night.” It feels weird, hearing it from him. On the TV. It feels weird to know that other people are acknowledging it, that something bad is happening, and everyone knows now. Think of the apocalypse cults. Riots. “What the hell?” I say under my breath. Emily and I share this horrible look. Everything is going to change. “What are we going to do?” she asks me, expecting a response. I have none but she deserves one. She deserves to be given reassurance. Emily doesn’t look convinced. I know that trying to tell her this hasn’t achieved much. It’s confusing. Everything. Is just confusing. It was supposed to have ended on the cruise ship. When De Luca’s gun was pointed at my face and I got out of it. Instead, it’s only gotten worse. And it will get worse. “I can’t do this, Emily.” I can’t. I can’t do this. “I’m going to bed.” It will be my father this time. Or Colin. Or Emily. It won’t be my mother. It will be someone else. I think it will be everyone else but me, because they are out to get me, they hate me for surviving and they’ll make me suffer for it. They’ll take everyone I’ve ever cared about until I’m the only one that’s left—hopelessly alone—and then, finally, they’ll take me. They’ll take me and… I’m visiting Dr. Sunshine today. The shield shatters when I enter her office. It’s the smell. It overpowers everything because I recognize it as a place of both stress and peace, evoking such powerful emotions and increases in brain chemicals that the Xanax has no choice but to retreat into the depths of my mind. NPR is on and they’re talking about the outbreak in Texas. I don’t get it. It’s NPR. They’re not supposed to talk about shit like that. 20,000. I gulp. So many. So, so many. Dad turns down the radio. I look at him, this horrible look in my eyes and it’s hopeless. It’s just hopeless. I don’t even know why we’re here. We should be at home, preparing for the shit to hit the fan, for everything to come tumbling down. I should be enjoying my last couple days of freedom, of this life, but deep down I know I couldn’t care less about ‘this life’. I hate ‘this life’. I hate being safe. I hate not having the constant threat of death looming over my head. I need it like we all need air and water and food. I need to have something worth living for—maybe Emily, maybe excitement, a change in the schedule—and if I don’t, I’ll wither into the snow and melt. I told her that back in October, when I first started seeing her. She wanted to commit me to a ward. “You told me what, Daniel?” There are dark bags under her eyes. She is just as freaked out as the rest of us. Dr. Sunshine sips on her coffee. She flattens out her dress. Tic-Tacs rattle in her pockets. “I had good reason to think that, Daniel. Before the outbreak in Mexico, the idea of the dead coming back to life as soulless mutants was fantastical. All the signs pointed towards the sinking of the ship being so traumatic that your mind made up a new story to make it seem less than it really was.” “Maybe so.” And I can’t do it anymore. I can’t stay in this box that smells like cheap cinnamon candles and I can’t look at this woman’s smile and I can’t talk out my problems. I can’t. When the undead show up at my front door, there will not be any talking out my problems. There will be blood and death and fire and it will be Hell. I need to face this. I’m overtaken by this urge to go there. To feel it again. To feel the chaos consume me, drag me down and become one with it. I want it. I want chaos. I dodge cars and screaming pedestrians. There are sedans parked in bushes and Cadillacs boxing each other in. An elderly man is slumped at the wheel of his truck, the windshield bashed in. The snow below is stained red. I don’t know what I’m doing here. Will I loot this store like everyone else has? No. I don’t think I will. I just needed to see it. I needed to see the desolation with my own eyes. I needed to see what we have been rendered as: Sheep trapped in a pin. Cows being swept into the butcher’s knife. It wasn’t her. It was just a shell of her. It was just the absolute minimum of what she was expected of. She loved us, but she didn’t love us. It wasn’t true. And now she’s at the bottom of the ocean. There’s this guy that’s yelling at me. He’s a soldier and his eyes are angry and he’s spilled his bag of imperishable food because of me. Because he ran into me. I stand up and I punch him. He cries out, wraps his leg around my torso, and spins me around so that I’m immobile and he has me wrapped up like a spider encasing its prey in its web. He slams my head against the pavement and the snow doesn’t do much to cushion the impact. It leaves me dazed but I squeeze out of his grasp, somehow, and I lay another punch on him before a cop tackles me. I feel cold metal digging into my wrists and a click. I don’t know what’s going on. He lifts me up and all but drags me to his car. There’s a slow trickle of blood running down my forehead; I can tell because it stings my eyes. Then he slams the door without reading me my Miranda rights. Ha. I just got curbstomped. I wonder if they will infect the suburbs and then Emily and Colin and Dad will either die or join them. Jail. There’s a screeching of breaks against the ice and asphalt. Through the haze, I can make out a figure lying in the street. It’s still and I can see that its clothes are ripped. I’ve seen enough dead bodies to know what it is. A wave of nausea overpowers me, and maybe it’s that I’m concussed, but I vomit all over that cop’s interior. He yells at me but I can’t really make it out The end of the world has begun. “What’s your name?” “What happened?” “What hurts?” “Are you eighteen?” “Do you have a legal guardian—” That’s when the silence hits me. I look up, blinking out my eyes to adjust to the light. Through the old steel bars, I can see, clear as day, that my worst fears are confirmed. It’s deserted. The ‘waiting room’ for being put in your cell is devoid of life. There’s no one. Nothing. The news is on the TV and the anchor is talking in a hurried, frantic voice. Like she wants to go home. It’s happening. Maybe it got into the water. Maybe someone stowed away an infected and brought it down here, looking for some miracle cure that does not exist. I don’t know. But I know they’re here. I know they are. I can’t get the image out of my head. It excites me. It makes me crave blood again. And I’m a killer. I want gore. I want death. People. They’re not the arms of undead. They’re other inmates. I back myself into my cot. It bangs against the wall, rattling the entire room and making this horrible sound. Deep breath. My head is ringing but I can think. “Attract who?” It’s basically rhetorical though. I sit back down on my cot. This is all happening too fast. I’m in a jail—more specifically, a freaking tiny ass jail cell with no food or water and inmates all around me with only a dozen or so steel bars for protection—and there are zombies outside. I know there are. I can feel death hanging in the air like a storm. It’s horrible. It’s so, so horrible. Then the moans. They’re here.

Sorry man, but he says 'Can he get em both' not 'can he get the MOAB'. :(

1. It's a stun grenade. I even told you this on Skype before you posted this. 2. It's a killstreak. I think that's a fair killstreak. You should be rewarded for being good. Plus, why are you upset if there's going to be a perk that cancels it out (most likely)? That IS balance. That is the very definition of balance. 3. The range seems to be ridiculously small. One of those 'electric throwing knives' will take out that ADS with one good throw, I'm willing to bet. 4. Yeah exactly like the RCXD... except these can be killed with stingers and you'll be invisible to it with the Blind Eye/Ghost perk they will surely add. And getting five kills is also a lot harder than getting three. 5. Same deal as number 2. It's a replacement for the heartbeat sensor. If you've got a problem with it, throw on assassin or whatever they'll call it. 6. That'll be another assault drone. And considering how easy it is to get your care package stolen, no one really complains about them. 7. Activision learned their lesson after MW2. There may be one shotgun that is good, but it will do what a shotgun is supposed to do: be the superior weapon at close range. 8. Again, if you're good at the game, you should be rewarded. I'm not even that great at FPS's but I never complain about the high end killstreaks. Why? Because the best players should be rewarded with more kills. If you disagree, go play MW3. They've got deathstreaks and stealth bombers and all that fun stuff. 9. What... In all honesty, BF3 is a completely different game than any CoD. And if you wanna go there, I'll go there, bro. I wasn't willing to pay EA even more money to use their servers, so I had to Google some stuff. Sorry. This is pulled directly off the Battlefield Wiki. The knife cuts both ways. 10. Map design? You've seen a grand total of three maps--tiny portions of these maps, in fact--and you're already judging them. Aight. Ok, that's it! I respect your opinions but I couldn't help pointing out counterarguments. Later! -perfect

Pre round 10? I take the Carpenter. I don't care about slower spawns--I want the free 200 points! But after that, yeah, I don't take em. A Carpenter when running the alley on Kino is no fun. I don't really have many pet peeves. Yeah, I'm not a fan of the usual stuff (ie kill stealing early on, rage quitting, etc.) but there's only one thing a few things I can think up off the top of my head that really grind my gears. 1. Don't come through my kiting spot without giving me fair warning. This is just common sense, people. Especially if I'm green and he's white or blue. OOOOH that just pisses me off. Not only does it take my zombies, but it's putting both of us at risk by running wildly through a pack of zombies like a chicken with its head cut off. If you go down in my kiting area, tough luck. Maybe you'll have learned your lesson by the time you respawn. 2. Opening doors at inopportune times This is mainly for random games, but it applies in private matches as well. For co op on CotD, I like camping at the top of the boat. It's not that uncommon of a strategy and a great way to build up points and also give you more freedom to roam around the map than going sickle (once you go down the slide, you're stuck there until you open a door). But camping at the top of the boat doesn't work with the power door open. And yet, 75% of the time, someone opens up the door. STUPID STUPID STUPID. 3. Being dumb on Moon (and Call of the Dead [and Ascension] Don't run a train in NML when there's 4 people in the lobby. Don't throw nades in the labs/spawn. Don't pick up the hacker if you're not willing to protect the base from the excavators. Don't throw Gersches at the astronaut. Don't piss of George. Don't open up both doors at the spawn on Ascension. Just common sense stuff on these map specific things. Come on people!

Then get ready for a letdown dude. Gamescom... maybe. If multiplayer is playable, then Zombies is not all that farfetched. But don't get your hopes up.

No that was definitely a sniper No... it was definitely a shotgun. You could see him pulling back the bolt...

No that was definitely a sniper :lol:

IKR? I missed that so much! That's why WaW has stayed my favorite COD! It's gonna be really powerful too! That guy got a triple with it! :D

The unscoped bolt action rifle. Officially pumped for Blops 2 multiplayer. :lol:

Moon is my favorite map at this point. Why? The actual Moon is piss easy, while NML is a lot of work. Even now we are still finding new ways to improve our kill total. That's replayability right there. Treyarch figured out a way to appease everyone. They gave the people that want easy maps the Moon, and they gave the hardcore players NML. Everyone wins!